So, I’m in Target with my kids, Molly is screaming in the cart because she wants to get out and run away. Dylan SO badly wants a Star Wars toy that he is breaking down in the middle of the underwear/bra section. I am praying for some divine intervention. But I do need to do a little bit of discipline here. So I am trying to give my son a time out inside the basket part of the cart next to his screaming sister, and trying to reason with my 2 year old daughter. My voice was a little louder than it normally is, I’m sure I was a sight to see. It was awesome! And a lady approaches me and asks, “Are you Pastor Maguire’s wife?”.
Crap. This is a perfect time for a first meeting from someone from the church. I said, “Yes.” And then she just said, “It’s nice to put a face with a name.” And she walked away. What? Oh great, that’s just the “face” I want her remember. I wanted to run after her and say, “I’m really a great mom, I’m so nice, I tell my kids i love them ALL the time, and I clean up real good I promise!” But I didn’t. Oh well, what can you do?
7
I’m Amanda Maguire and I have been “Married to a Youth Pastor” for almost 12 years now. We have 3 kids, Dylan (8) and Molly (6) and Scotty (3). I worked in full-time youth ministry for 4 years, got married and got a “real job”, allowing me to continue to be a volunteer in youth ministry for another 4 years. We started having kids and now I’m just married to the Youth Pastor. I have great friends and a fun life! I have a passion and a calling for wives just like me, married to a Youth Pastor.
I love to write.
I love to do creative activities.
I love to run.
I love to shop.
I love to dine out.
And I would love time to do any of these things more.
Latest Tweet
This post is awesome! I empathize with you completely and know that you are not alone!:-) That lady may respect you more for attempting to discipline in public instead of not doing anything at all–I know my grandma always appreciated that.
My daughter threw a fit in Wal-Mart a couple of weeks ago. Of course she got reprimanded, but apparently she wasn’t through with testing me that day. At one point she even yelled, “Help!” because she was trying to get out of the cart, but all I could think of was what a passer-by would think I was doing to my two-year old! She had already thrown about five things out of the cart whenever there was no one to talk to in the aisles (she would whine until someone would approach her and then she would instantly stop and be all smiles–I was not amused, but I digress.) I was at my limit. I went to get a frozen pizza because I was worn out already and knew I didn’t want to think about dinner when…it happened! I turned to reach into the freezer just in time to hear a box hit the floor and pasta noodles exploding all over. “Noodles! Oh No!” my daughter exclaims and I had to hold my tongue so I wouldn’t exclaim anything!!!! Yeah, I just looked around, bent down to pick up what I could and prayed no one from church was there. We had already talked to one church member not ten minutes before but she missed the show–Praise the Lord! I pretty much left after that–with half my stuff still to get. Needless to say we skipped the free cookie at the bakery.
I’m sorry I write way toooooo much! I feel like you have to understand everything I go through since I relate to everything you write!:-)
I’ve had to leave a cart at the store because my daughter wasn’t having a great day grocery shopping. Left it right there full of unpaid groceries. Had to go back and get them later–the nice people at the store saved them in the walk in fridge! Must’ve parented little kids before!
I’m also a pastor’s wife–we live in Colorado and have been in ministry for 13 years now. Your blog has been SO refreshing and I’ve shared it with 4-5 other pastor’s wives in my area. We had a similar incident Friday night when we were appliance shopping and ran into someone from church while my youngest was opening and slamming oven doors on floor models at Lowe’s. Thanks again for your openness.
We live in a fairly small town and for as often as my three kids are at church or babysat by youth group kids there is no hiding the reality of our situation but someone said the nicest thing to me after our first couple years here. I was holding onto my sons arm while he was crying and trying to get away and my girls were climbing on a large banister in the church entrance (it is tempting) and I was shouting through clenched teeth “get over here or else” and someone (I don’t even remember who) said it is so refreshing to see that you are a normal mom and wife with a normal family. I think too often the people of the church put us on some ridiculous pedestal and think we are so perfect because we are in ministry. Hehehehe I welcome people glimpsing at the reality of my life!
My husband is the youth pastor at a large church in the DC metro area. My 3yr old son loves to throw fits. He’s a very big boy, so controlling him when he’s mad is no small task – we’re talking 45 lbs of writhing/screeming/kicking fury (with some obligatory tears just for effect)! His favorite time to spaz on me is during our weekly family dinner – in the church social hall! He must enjoy the audience, because he performs regularly each week to my absolute humiliation. It’s usually in the serving line while I’m trying to balance three plates of food, his things from preschool, my daughters hand and hold on to him at the same time. Oh well, at least it’s good for my diet – who can eat after all that! My husband sent me to this page because he tho’t I could relate to it – he has NO idea! Thanks for the site, misery does indeed love company:) All joking aside – it’s good to know that I’m not the only one out here…
I recently discovered your blog! Thank you! I’m loving it and can SO relate! My husband was in youth ministry for 13 years and is currently serving in Family and Children’s Ministry. We have two boys (5 and 2), and I can’t begin to count the number of times I have thought “Please behave, please behave….” However, our 5-year old has shoved me out of the mold of putting on a show and acting like we have it altogether (dang…. he just won’t comply with faking it! HA!) In fact, I just got a call from his Sunday morning small group leader, to discuss what “we” can do to help (yep, because he is getting bored and acting out behaviorally). So hard to get calls like that….
BUT…. I have realized that it is much more helpful for people to see that we are REAL than that we have it all together (they know better anyway!) That we still have hard days with our kids. That we adore each other, but ARE still a “normal” married couple. I find that people are much more willing to approach me with their issues when they’ve seen mine firsthand!