Have you ever really messed up? I mean, completely blown it. I have and I thought there is no way to recover from this one. I have finally figured out that it is okay to mess up and fail! Congratulations, you didn’t do it!
The great thing about failing is that it is not the end result. It is part of the process. Another element in life. For instance, Abraham Lincoln’s resume:
? 1831 – Lost his job ? 1832 – Defeated in run for Illinois State Legislature ? 1833 – Failed in business ? 1834 – Elected to Illinois State Legislature (success) ? 1835 – Sweetheart died ? 1836 – Had nervous breakdown ? 1838 – Defeated in run for Illinois House Speaker ? 1843 – Defeated in run for nomination for U.S. Congress ? 1846 – Elected to Congress (success) ? 1848 – Lost re-nomination ? 1849 – Rejected for land officer position ? 1854 – Defeated in run for U.S. Senate ? 1856 – Defeated in run for nomination for Vice President ? 1858 – Again defeated in run for U.S. Senate ? 1860 – Elected President (success)
Not great. Obviously not all those events were his fault but they could have caused him to quit trying.
So, if you feel like nothing is going right….then you are on the right track. It doesn’t matter if the failure is in marriage, work, ministry, or faith. You aren’t finished yet, so if you want to go from suck to success, you only need one step. Get back up and keep trying.
Jeremy Bloom is trying to figure out life, God, and family. Follow him on Twitter – @finding_jeremy or on his blog about youth ministry.
This will be my third year at SYMC, and to say that I am excited is an understatement. I have had a countdown going on my computer for weeks, and just recently made one of those elementary school paper chain countdown things in my office. (Seriously, it droops over the picture wall!)
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SYMC 2010 in Chicago was my first year. I went with a couple of other youth workers in my local network who had been before and said how great it was. I was kind of reluctant to go. I had been in a valley in my ministry and felt like I was on my way out. I thought that I would go and maybe get a few good nuggets of info here or there, hear a couple of good bands, and head back to a situation that I wanted so desperately to flee. What I got from SYMC was so much more. Yes, I did get some information that I was able to use in my ministry, and yes, I heard some good music, but I got so so much more than that. I got back my passion for ministry, this wasn?t something planned but God knew what I needed and showed me just that at SYMC. I also strengthened old relationships and built new friendships and relationships. Those people I met have become some of my closest friends to this day and have [...]
I’ve noticed something lately about the way the church and youth ministries tend to talk to girls. We (unfortunately at times I would include myself) communicate that the end game for a girl is getting the right kind of guy. Even though we don’t mean to it just happens. Books sold to teen girls about how to get the right kind of guy (a christian book nonetheless…and I haven’t read it but I am assuming the title is meant to mislead by promising to help girls snag a guy.) A youtube video for Christian girls on how to attract a godly guy. And than we are surprised and frustrated that all girls care about is boys. Oh the irony.
We need to change the end game.
The end game for every girl we encounter should be a radical life following after Jesus. That life may include an occupation in the public circles, a life of full time ministry, marriage, kids or all of the above.
When we begin to believe in a bigger or more radical end game for girls it changes how we communicate to them. We tell their stories better. And in my heart I believe we help girls move their attention from dating to bigger dreams…from drama to radical living. Don’t we all really want that for our girls?
What do you think? What are your thoughts about changing the end game?
Posted by Kurt Johnston
This is the 5th in a little series about some of the things that have helped me last for almost 25 years. There is no silver bullet here, just a little insight about things that have seemed to make a difference in my journey as a youth worker.
BLEED IT, BUT DON’T BLEED TO DEATH!
Every now and then, a young youth worker will say something like this, “Youth ministry is my life!”. To which I always reply internally, and upon occasion even blurt out, “Really? That’s too bad.”
I think youth ministry, or any ministry endeavor for that matter, deserves some extra effort. Youth ministry isn’t for folks who are clock-watchers, who only want to do the minimum job requirements. I actually think it deserves to be led by men and women who aren’t afraid to “bleed” it a little bit. But we should NEVER bleed to death!
- When you consistently sacrifice your family for the sake of your youth ministry…you are bleeding to death. - When your friendships suffer because you spend too much time at youth ministry events…you are bleeding to death. - When you have no outside hobbies because you spend your free time with teenagers or planning events for teenagers…you are bleeding to death. - When you fail to take your day off, or you skimp on vacation time due to the demands of youth ministry…you are bleeding to death. - When you spend time in the word out of the need to [...]
Our good friend (and founder) Thom Schultz has an interesting take on one of the ongoing debates in youth missions – Are they really worth it?
Short-Term Missions A Waste?
What do you think? Did Thom get it right?
Don’t sell Jesus short.
I spent the weekend with a church in a faith tradition I am fairly new to. They have a rich heritage of liturgical worship. But if one made the mistake of thinking this church’s denom is bereft of showing feelings of faith or the goodness of God, one would be wrong.
The YP of this church had a similar epiphany today. She has a deep love for Jesus but thought her diverse international students would be uncomfortable with referencing anyone but “God.” After all, they don’t declare an emotional faith and “Jesus” is just too intimate, right?
After she had a discussion with my ministry partner, Adam DeVries, she told her students she was going to unashamedly call Jesus by his name. How shocked and delighted she was when they were happy for her AND them. They cheered.
My point? Don’t sell Jesus short in your youth ministry. Kids KNOW when they come near you that there’s a good chance they’re going to hear about God. They’re even disappointed when they don’t.
Remember: Jesus is the name of the one to whom everyone will bow. It’s just a matter of when.
S
q Jeremiah 1:4 ?The Word of God came to me saying, before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born, I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.?
q God had a vision a plan for you. Do you have one for the assignment He has given you?
q Vision: The picture of God?s potential, purpose, and possibilities for your life.
q Show me a person without vision, and I will show you a person who is at a standstill in life.
q Proverbs 29:18 ?Where there is no vision the people perish.?
q Life Point: The key element to getting out of my present state is the vision that I have for myself.
q Jeremiah 29:11 ?For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope,
Vision Truthsq True vision goes beyond what I can accomplish on my own.
q True vision adds value to others.
q True vision attracts vision.
q True vision must have God in it.
q Acts 2:17 ?And it shall come to pass in the last days says God, I will pour out of my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and daughters shall prophesy and your young men shall see visions and your old men shall dream dreams.?
5 Road Blocks to Vision Failure
Because we are wives of a youth pastor and we never disagree…
What if you don’t necessarily agree with the direction your husband is taking the ministry, or if you just don’t see eye to eye with ministry issues (he’s in charge of).
How can you feel this way and still have him feel supported?
What do you, as a WIFE, not as a staff person, not as a volunteer, not as a church attender, but just as a wife (that is still all of those other things)… what do you say or do to encourage your husband when all the chips are down? When the Senior Pastor is breathing down his neck, and the elders are not “behind” him anymore?
I want to fight, I want to take on the church. I want to knock on the Sr. Pastor’s door and tell him “what-for”. I also want to say, “forget it then, let’s pack up and go somewhere else.” (I would not suggest doing either if you want your husband to ever talk to you again.)
But its so hard to not be able to DO anything.
Been there?
The Hard Question
by Laura H.
The high school that most of our students attend just got a shock yesterday. One of the students committed suicide. We have a few students that have attended elementary school through high school with this student, but none have said they were particularly “close” to this individual. Many students are asking questions, seeking solace, and probably dealing with anger and, maybe even some, guilt. Our students will now be a shoulder for other students at school to lean on. How are we (in ministry) equipping our students to help others through tragedies like this? Are we? Is their faith real enough, personal enough, strong enough to take the hit but maintain it’s depth? Or is their faith built on cushy sand (or could I even be more bold and specific as to say built on silly youth group games, fun events, & activities) that will wash away when a strong wave hits? Or, are we helping our students to know where to turn to when the tough times/questions hit? In a situation like this… when that best friend turns to a friend and says, “How could God let ‘Mike’ kill himself?” Will they at least be ready to say I don’t know, but stand firm on their faith in the One who loves and created that suicidal teen? Will they eventually be able to share about the hope they have? Or… will they have spent too much time in youth group playing games that they don’t really know what they believe?
Laura’s post really made me reflect on our HS ministry. When tragedy hits any youth group you really can find its pulse and what’s making it tick..the games, the relationships, the pastors, or the Lord. It can really reveal the “health” of the group. Its always good to keep asking the tough questions even if we are not ready to face the answers sometimes.
A post by Jennifer C.
I have a question for all of you and would love to hear what you married to youth pastor people think.
Do you ever feel like you should not have to be involved in every aspect of church life/ministry just because your spouse happens to be the youth pastor?
Many people support their spouse’s career without having direct involvement with every detail of their job. I love what we do in ministry and am not burnt-out. Sometimes I have a hard time saying no.
How do you handle saying no to things without seeming stand-offish or distant? Do you ever feel guilty because you want to say no to church activities?
Thanks for any feedback you can give me. God Bless you all!
Thanks for sharing your stories and being so vulnerable.
Amanda
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