Enjoyed reading Jeremy’s post over on REYouthPastor talking about burnout and youth ministry. He asks some good questions, and I’d love to read some of your thoughts on the subject or burnout. Here’s a clip of his stuff, head over there to read the whole thing and comment if you would like:
Pain is part of the youth pastor job description. Does experiencing pain and exhaustion season a youth pastor? One of the biggest negative aspects of being a youth pastor is that working with students stunts our emotional and life growth.
Many youth pastors try so hard to dodge the ?burn out? bullet.
We try to take more days off, vacations, see a psycho-therapist, take a monthly spiritual retreat, and pursue spiritual formation but it seems like we are only left with more exposed pain, exhaustion, and burn out. There is this belief that if you burn out, you are a bad youth pastor because apparently you didn?t take enough days off or establish healthy boundaries. I think the exact opposite is true.
America?s best youth pastors are the youth workers who have learned and persevered through their many painful and hurtful church experiences. The youth pastors that persevere make it, but the youth pastors that live in the past and become jaded don?t make it.
My point ? the best youth pastors are the youth pastors who burn out or get burned because very early on they learn to forgive and to let go.
JG
We are excited to finally roll out the new SYMC website for 2011. The new site has the speaker line-up (although there’s more to come there), the great Training options, and all the registration details you need to know. There’s so much there you’ll have to check it out what Doug and the rest of the gang have planned.
We are so excited, I hope you join us in Chicago, March 4 – 7 2011.
1 September 2010
posted by Scott Rubin
Some of your churches are like mine, and you encourage some of your volunteers to ?take a breath? during the summer months. We push the pause button on our small groups in June & July so that our faithful volunteers can vacation, rest, and be ready to jump back into investing in junior highers once the school year begins. Honestly, our ministry is less effective during those months, and I miss those volunteers like crazy, but for us it?s the best choice in the long run. (and, it probably explains why so many of our volunteers have stuck around for years & years!)
So last week, I was anticipating the ?re-arrival? of our school year volunteers. I said to our staff team, ?Who?s one person that you?re really really looking forward to serving alongside of this year?? It was fun to hear people?s answers? and look forward to this fun we?re going to have together this year, as we point middle schoolers towards Jesus.
Later that day, I decided to take 4 minutes & jot a note to one of those volunteers? and tell them how much they?re valued around here ? and why. It?s a habit I?m trying to ?re-create? ? because honestly, I?ve gotten a little sloppy with it! (Which is crazy, because when I get an encouragement note, sometimes I?ll carry it around with me for a few days!) Thoughtful words are really meaningful to me — and in about 4 minutes, I can put some fuel in someone?s tank just by jotting them a snail-mail note. In a mailbox full of credit card offers and cable-tv-advertisements, a card from you would be a welcome site!
This may make the live bloggers a little miffed, but apple announced they will live stream their event tomorrow. I love that they made this move.
From their site: Apple will broadcast its September 1 event online using Apple?s industry-leading HTTP Live Streaming, which is based on open standards. Viewing requires either a Mac running Safari on Mac OS X version 10.6 Snow Leopard, an iPhone or iPod touch running iOS 3.0 or higher, or an iPad?. The live broadcast will begin at 10:00 a.m. PDT on September 1, 2010 at www.apple.com.
I’ll be sure to log in, how about you?
UPDATE: Here the link for the live stream: http://events.apple.com.edgesuite.net/1009qpeijrfn/event. Here are the system requirements: Safari 4 or 5 on Mac OS X Snow Leopard or Safari on iOS 3 or later. Sorry PC friends.
Yesterday I was on an hour long live radio show with Faith Radio in Saint Paul, Minnesota. We talked about the book I wrote with Reggie and Abbie called, The Slow Fade. They asked me a bunch of questions, people called in and sent emails to ask questions. If you’re interested in listening to that interview via podcast, click here.
Here?s a thought-provoking twist on an old game that you can use at a youth group meeting to help kick-off your fall and to generate a great discussion about community and commitment to each other. With this new twist on the classic Hide and Seek, from back in the day, your youth will have to make a decision that will provoke deeper thoughts as to: “Why we hide sometimes,” “Why do we not seek others out” and “How does it feel to be ‘found’.”
Hide and Seek (with a twist)
Ur YM has kicked off for the fall or is about to. How’s ur voluntold team looking?
Mark DeVries in his epic book, Sustainable Youth Ministry, says u should have 1 adult volunteer (engaged and relational I would add) for every 5 of ur youth. How’s that going for you?
Some of u are doing great. Skip the rest of this blog then and go back to chatting on FB.
For the rest of you: having trouble getting enough good volunteers?
Three reasons why: 1) Have you asked the right people?
2) Have you given them a specific job description with clear cut expectations, boundaries, plans and purpose?
3) Are you spending more time with ur teens than w ur volunteers?
Let any one of these three facts go awry and that’s a place to start figuring out why ur begging and pleading for help. Why ur pulling out hairs u can’t spare from ur head. Why uve even resorted to asking the SP if he would like to help “chaperon” the MS lock-in. Ur are one desperate YP if it comes to that!
Stephanie
PS-u can always tell when i’m posting from my phone. grammer, spelling and abbreviations don’t seem to matter to me.
We did it! And we are home! Thanks for all your prayers, it was amazing and such fun. Everything went perfect and everyone is healthy. Jeff did a great blow by blow (or push by push) recording of the day on our family blog if you are interested : maguiresblog.blogspot.com
Here we are Party of 5!!
It’s been a while since I posted last, but we have been on our family vacation. Jeff is not allowed cell phones or computers, so I had to oblige the same, its only fair.
We spent a refreshing and relaxing week with my family in San Antonio, Tx. Its not Hawaii, or Paris, its not even Yosemite, or Disney World, but there was no church, no students, and I had a husband all day every day for an entire blissful week. Praise Jesus!
I indulged in Rudy’s BBQ, Puffy tacos, TexMex galore, and all the Bluebell ice cream I could eat in 7 days. (I am so jealous of any of you that are able to have these tasty treats all year long.) I tell you, I’m 20 pounds larger and it has NOTHING to do with the fact that I am 7 months pregnant!
I just dropped my husband off at church ready for camp. Round 2 of 6 trips this summer, here we go! Being Memorial Day weekend I am finding that a lot of friends and family are going to be away as well these few days that Jeff is gone. Boo for me. So I’m ready with lots of DVD’s for after the kids go to bed, a trip to Disneyland to wear everyone out, and planning on eating out as much as I can ☺.
Ugh, I really am not looking forward to this…
I have mentally prepared for this for a while now, and still feel like I am holding my breath until Tuesday. Hopefully we will all stay healthy and lice free this trip! I’ll let you know how it goes.
So, I’m in Target with my kids, Molly is screaming in the cart because she wants to get out and run away. Dylan SO badly wants a Star Wars toy that he is breaking down in the middle of the underwear/bra section. I am praying for some divine intervention. But I do need to do a little bit of discipline here. So I am trying to give my son a time out inside the basket part of the cart next to his screaming sister, and trying to reason with my 2 year old daughter. My voice was a little louder than it normally is, I’m sure I was a sight to see. It was awesome! And a lady approaches me and asks, “Are you Pastor Maguire’s wife?”.
Crap. This is a perfect time for a first meeting from someone from the church. I said, “Yes.” And then she just said, “It’s nice to put a face with a name.” And she walked away. What? Oh great, that’s just the “face” I want her remember. I wanted to run after her and say, “I’m really a great mom, I’m so nice, I tell my kids i love them ALL the time, and I clean up real good I promise!” But I didn’t. Oh well, what can you do?
Today I asked my 4 year old, “What’s the name of our church?”
He replied, “Daddy’s Work.”
Yep. Pretty much…
Just a lice update, I know you’ve been waiting. I think we are clear. I will continue to do mountains of laundry and hold my breath for the next week just to make sure. My husband is home and did not quite escape the pain and torture of the Rid Kit. I did a treatment on him just for fun (my fun…hehehe). And I made him vacuum the furniture a couple of times. He feels my pain. So now on to better, less itchy issues…
I know we don’t know each other that well, but I know you will relate to my REAL life. My husband has been away in New York City at a conference with his other Pastor buddies. Usually I am glad that he can get away even though it is incredibly hard for me to survive alone! This week I feel a little different. While he has been visiting the Empire State building, eating amazing food, and just hanging out in NYC being a grown up with grown up people, I have been at home with 2 kids and a pregnant belly, and LICE! (Now we are good friends). Lice, seriously!? What was God thinking? Did you know that when you are pregnant you can’t use the Rid Lice Removal Kit. You can’t even touch the chemicals that are in the products. My poor mom flew in from Texas to wash my kids hair and spray our home. As for me…? I guess we are going to try to pray the lice away? My lucky husband, stuff like this seems to always happen during conferences and camps. It really makes me want to cuss. Honestly, I have been (a lot). I’m sure you’ve been there.
My husband is very funny. When he teaches he is clever and can drive a strong point home with great humor. He really is gifted. So, whenever I get introduced as …”This is our Youth Pastor Jeff Maguire’s wife, Amanda”, it is 99.9% usually followed with this comment, “Oh, Jeff Maguire’s wife! Your husband is so funny! You must laugh ALL the time!”
I 100% of the time smile and nod and say, “Yes, he is so great.” But in my head, 99.9% of the time I am thinking, “Are you nuts? Of course we don’t just laugh ALL the time. You’re ridiculous!”
Oh, ha ha ha, it’s 5am and you have to go to church early…he he he.
Whew, he he, a student backed into our minivan in the church parking lot, ha ha!
Oh, goodness, pizza again! …good one!
Come on people!
(We do often get a good laugh out of his paycheck).
Along the same lines as the previous blog, I searched the “gifts” for a pastor’s wife on the same web site. Here are the top 5:
1. Dry highlighters (Seriously??)
2. A doormat that reads: “As for me and my house..”
3. A “word Keeper” bible cover
4. Shield of faith pendants
5. A garden flag that reads: Love one another.
…I know earlier I said I loved the idea of all the gifts. Um, not these! Not all pastor’s wives are 84 and have bible covers. Seriously.
No, I didn’t think this through! Had I made a pro/con list, there is a good likely hood it wouldn’t have happened (sort of sarcastic). I was in full time ministry for a few years before we got married, so I kinda knew what I was in for. We got married and someone had to get a real job…me.
Then we started having kids, Dylan 4, Molly 2, and baby #3 on the way (due in September). So my ministry journey has been a roller coaster, but whose ministry journey isn’t? This is a crazy business being married to a youth pastor. Luckily, I have some wonderful mentors and friends who are on a similar journey and a great sense of humor. Because if you can’t laugh at your husband and your church…you will go nuts!
My hope for this blog is that it be a place for youth pastors’ wives to visit and laugh, and relate to these entries. I would love for this to become a little community where we can encourage each other through comments and even emails. I also pray that this would be a tool for us to learn from others who are on the same journey even though our stories are so different. I am not an expert but I am passionate about our calling. We are stretched much further than most know and are much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.
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