It Really was a Stretch…

Back from the SYM Conference in Chicago, wheewww! HUGE sigh of relief. Don’t get me wrong, it was grrreat. But I am beat. And still amazed that they ask me back each year
(not fishing for a complement or anything) But seriously, I am not a speaker! It doesn’t come naturally, I have a crazy hard time communicating what’s in my brain and getting it to come out of my mouth. Writing is so much easier. You can take your time, think it through, erase it, start again, and even trash it right in the middle… Not so much when you are speaking to a bunch of people. “Oh dear!”, is all I think when I think about some of the things I said. I mean, I didn’t cuss or anything (not out loud at least). But it was so hard to find the right words that I was so excited to talk about.
It is so strange that God would ask me to do something like this if He knows this isn’t how I am shaped, right? I don’t like this awkward stretching of myself. I am not comfortable in this position. I am super happy and content to write my blog, maybe a book sometime soon, and be on my merry way. Its clear that God has shaped me for some things and NOT for others.
This type of feeling seems to be a theme in my [...]
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Something happened to me this evening that happens every so often when I meet people for the first time that go to our church… I play soccer each week with a group of “soccer moms”. It is a random bunch of women and it is so much fun. I started playing because my neighbor invited me and she knows someone from her son’s school who brought someone from a league, who has a sister who plays soccer, etc., etc.. All that to say, they don’t go to our church and I barely know many of them and they could care less who my husband is and what he does for a living. We just have fun playing soccer because we are women who like it.
This isn’t profound by any means, but I know some of you follow this site through Twitter and a few months ago my account was hacked. Its fixed now, and along with it I personally figured out how to twitter. I am soo lame! So if you want to follow me on twitter, you can
Our church had an amazing conference this past weekend and we called it “Lumen”. I am so proud of the church that I serve to have embraced and challenged its people to dialogue about controversial issues and how we, as loving followers of Christ, should always wrestle with these things and respond. Some of the topics included human trafficking, and nuclear weapons, to homosexuality. It was unbelievable, my mind has not thought so long and hard about such things in quite awhile. Most would be quite surprised at what the scholars had to say. I have to tell you that I am changed forever in the way that I think about and process information through my “Christian filter”.
I went to a High School weekend service the other day. I had such a flood of mixed emotions that I didn’t expect. I was really excited to be there with no kids, I was also terrified to be there because I don’t have many relationships with students right now, I don’t know very many volunteers either. I saw so many things I wanted to change and be a part of the change. I wanted to jump right in where I left off 6 years ago, and I know I can’t. When I stepped back to have my own family I really thought by now I would be back in full-force. I can’t imagine leading a small group of girls right now. Just the time alone, and then there are hormones and relationships (boys and girls), and the talking and the talking and the talking! When I was sitting there, just watching it all flash before me I realized….. I’m not ready!
When Jeff leaves for camp or a conference and I stay home with three kids, and glad to be able to do it really. But I can’t help but feel a little jealous that he’s going to sleep through the night, not have to change a diaper, or deal with nap times, tantrums and bottles for a few days.
Quiet time is really hard. It’s hard to find and hard for me to sit still. I actually hate it. And I hate the phrase “quiet time”, when referring to time with God.
It’s here again! The Group Conference is the end of February and I need to start preparing. I love all your feedback and ideas about issues and topics that need to be discussed in the Married to a Youth Pastor Break Out.
My picture perfect family going to church each Sunday together, my kids coloring Jesus pictures, singing songs, and telling of the wonderful Bible story they learned as they apply it daily in their little lives…its not happening friends! For one, my husband and I can never go to church together (that’s a lie, we go twice a year together). And second, all three of my kids are in a phase of hating church. What do you do? It is so exhausting to spend 2 hours getting ready and out the door and spend another 40 minutes or so checking them all into their appropriate classes each one screaming or whimpering not to go, to then make it into the worship center to be paged out of church to go pick them all up again before hearing one word of the message. This has been my life for the past 2 years. Maybe some of you can relate?? (I do realize not all of you have kids).