Just Gotta Ask…

Amanda on February 9th, 2010

Anyone have a husband in Youth Ministry and you don’t wanna be?

And by that I  mean that you don’t want to serve and be a part of the Youth Ministry, really at all. Maybe because of kids, or a job, or serving in a different ministry, or simply because you just don’t want to. I feel like I am hearing more and more stories of wives serving right along side their husbands, but don’t want to. And as a wife still want to support and love that this is what their husbands are called to do. It has to be hard to know what to do with those feelings. I would love to give some encouragement to those women.

Being married to a Youth Pastor, or anyone in the church for that matter is truly a unique calling. When a wife is married to a Doctor no one expects her to scrub up next to him and help preform surgery, or a lawyer…you’re not expected to show up and defend a client. This “job” our husbands have comes with many hidden expectations of us as the wife.

I would love to hear your story, your voice about how youth ministry works for you and your spouse.

Mrs. H at 7:05am February 10

A month ago I would’ve written how I loved serving alongside my husband… how my heart is drawn towards the students & the “high” I feel when really connecting with one of the teen girls. … Fast forward to today and my heart has been stomped on one more time. Hubby got blindsided and fired from his position. This will be the third church we’ve left (the first one was our choice/moved to new church, second was incompatibility w/ the SP/dh resigned, and this one was money reasons “plus”/we were shocked and hurt). I am ready for a break from ministry. I’m not sure I can put my heart out there one more time… ultimately, I do believe that I have been called to serve alongside my hubby. God has given me a love for teens. That’s why losing the position suddenly hurt so much. We were suddenly yanked out, told he was done, with no warning to us or the students. Our heart hurt for us… and for them. I know that one day God will move us on to another church, after helping us heal through this. The draw is too large for both him and me. However, ’til then, I’m gonna be a little “gun shy.” For now, we need to find a new church in the area and allow our hearts to heal and to serve elsewhere, as just a lay person.
But, back to your ultimate question… we just had a baby in November (our second), so I was having to step back out of some of the activities. I still was committed to the regular weekly activities (& led a girls smallgroup) but passed on many of the extra “fun” activities built in each month. I guess, to me, that was a balance between the higher priority of my personal family and a lower priority of church family.

Kristin at 6:08pm October 23

I just googled my husband is a youth pastor because i was looking for some pw’s talking about how they don’t feel called to the youth ministry anymore…crazy to stumble upon this. At least i know i’m not alone…I wish i knew how to contact some of you. kscott1126@gmail.com I could really use someone that i don’t know at all to talk to! My hubby is 3 years into a 5 year verbal commitment. i want to support him but we have a 5 year old and a baby on the way….am i obligated to go to his youth service on sunday mornings?? i feel like he would be sad if i didn’t but sometimes i just want to go to church without my 5 year old and if i go to his service then i have to go to the 2nd service for adults and I have to bring my son. blahh…just not feeling very compelled for youth ministry right now…i’m frustrated with the teens and it’s just not my thing anymore…